I’m sitting in the waiting room waiting to be called to the OR. I have my Medical band on, pulse monitor on my finger and IV in.
The room is filled with mostly couples. I am by myself since Matt had to take t to daycare. He should be here soon. I hope he is here before I go in. Oh, just got a text, he is 1 stop away.
The atmosphere is pretty calm. Taylor swift is playing – lol..
They call people in 3 at a time. If I remember correctly there is a small secondary area where we sit awkwardly close to one another. Last time I was here I remember talking with a very nice woman who was trying for her second child and one person like me trying for their first. It’s interesting looking back at that conversation – I remember the woman with the child already being so friendly and supportive while the two of us, who did not have children were pretty quiet and wanted to keep to ourselves. The roles are reverse now. I see it from the other woman’s point of view. Of course, I can’t say we have the same exact views of things – that would be impossible, but you know what I mean.
The difference this time around is the pressure on myself. It is of course still there, but on a different level. It’s no longer the feeling of do or die .. it’s more like do or life will still be great. Does that make sense? I’m not minimizing secondary infertility by any means. It’s still hard, emotional and physically draining. It is also looked over because we already have a child. This topic is meant for its own post. Let’s get back to the matter at hand.. FOCUS JASMINE! .. to the egg retrieval.
I’m going in optimistic – it only takes one. My name is about to be called. Time to put the phone down and be present for now. Wish me luck!
(check out below of a video of the egg retrieval procedure .. it’s really interesting)
Random side notes & thoughts
Matt just went in … this is where I wonder – what if they mix up the sperm?!?!! Cmon, you know we all think of it at some point in this process. I know they take great care – but the mind always wonders. When I was pregnant with T, I asked my obgyn if we could check paternity – she gave me this crazy look and told me I had watched too many movies and not to worry “the baby will look kind of Asian” – she guaranteed it! That was the end of the discussion. If you have seen T, I’m petty sure she is ours, so she was right … I guess I should not waste my time worrying it about this time around then 🙂