Going in today I was extremely more nervous than I thought I would ever be. Why was I so nervous? Honestly, It comes down to hearing and reading so many stories where there was no heart beat. I know this should not effect me so much, but how could it not? I’m only human and I am in the moment.
Last night I viewed the film Vegas Baby for the first time. If you have not seen it – I highly recommend it. It is a documentary that follows the story of three people/couples trying to have a baby. It does a great job in showing the real emotional, economical and physical pains anyone struggling with infertility goes through. It also includes multiple situations where they are pregnant but then do not hear a heart beat or see growth in the baby. I sat there watching this last night knowing that today I would go in for my own test. My heart started beating so quickly, I jokingly thought to myself – not the best choice of movie to relax myself the night before. All that being said, this movie is fantastic. Watch it and encourage those that may not know what infertility really looks like to watch it as well. It all starts with education and awareness!!
On to the ultrasound! As I was saying, we were incredibly nervous. I will let the video show you what we saw and more importantly HEARD!
Matt and I were so happy afterwards. It is such a relief. Of course, we know that it’s not over yet, but this was a big stepping stone in the cycle. In the film, Vegas Baby, a woman joked about the steps of stress for a mom : 1. Am I pregnant? .. 2. Is there a heartbeat? 3. Is the baby born healthy? 4. what if they get hurt? .. 5 .. will they go to college? It’s never ending!!
We have offically graduated from the clinic and we can now move on to my normal OBGYN just like everyone else that never has to deal with the infertility bit. That still amazes me every time … Wait? this is what other people do if they don’t have to go through this? They don’t know how good they have it!
I wasted no time and have already scheduled an appointment with my OB. I am looking forward to seeing more of this little one inside of me. The human body is truly amazing.
As I mentioned in my FB Live feed. I am working on developing a resource that will help those trying to conceive. As part of the project, I would like to include stories and experiences from women who have or are currently dealing with infertility struggles. If you have a story you would like to share please message me at firstname.lastname@example.org . The story can be submitted anonymously so that no one will know it is you if that it what you prefer. Just know that sharing your story will help others out there and it will also be therapeutic for you to write it out for yourself. That is what it did for me and I am so glad that I embarked on this journey to share everything with you.
Thank you for your continued support!