This is a part of a series of posts where I am writing about my feelings/emotions towards the end of my pregnancy with my second child. This is the second of four. You can read the first entry here.
I write this as I am currently 36 weeks pregnant with my second child. This third trimester has caught me by surprise in so many ways. First, it has snuck up on me, I know I can’t be pregnant forever, but just like in my first pregnancy I always want more time because I do not feel ready. I know I will never feel ready. The second pregnancy I don’t feel ready for different reasons. This is the second of four posts where I will be expressing the emotions and feelings that I have been going through.
I have forgotten everything!!
I know T is only a little over two years old and that newborn life should not be that far from my memory but I feel like I have forgotten everything! The funny thing is since this is my second pregnancy and child, I am extremely relaxed about everything. The first pregnancy I felt like we were googling all kind of resources, taking birthing classes and baby classes, and I had hired a doula. As I write this at 36 weeks, we have done none of that.
I recently took out some of T’s newborn clothing to sort through for the little guy and things like swaddling, baby gloves etc.. came rushing back to me. I asked Matt if he remembered most of it (as I was hoping he did) but he also admitted to it being a big blur. Even now, it is not like I have frantically started to google and read up on books after realizing how much I have forgotten. I feel like we will be fine, it will either come back or there are always resources we can look up as we go. I joked with Matt that I am going to be having contractions and he will be on his phone googling .. “When do you go to the hospital when you are having contractions … ?” Oh boy!