My Infertility Story : Journal
I’m 1 in 8 : Coloring Page
National infertility awareness week"I am 1 in 8"Coloring therapy (1 in 8 experience infertility struggles) Get the "I am 1 in 8" coloring page to ease stress/anxiety and create awareness. Step 1: Click the button below to get "I am 1 in 8" coloring page.Step 2: Print...
Mother’s Day … when you are “trying” to get pregnant
Mother’s Day ... I spent a lot of time in bed this morning thinking about Mother’s Day ... originally I had planned to post a pic of me with my little ones singing all the joys and happiness associated with today but then all these mixed emotions came when...
National Infertility Awareness Week 2018
It's National Infertility Awareness Week ... Someone on social media was kind enough to send me a link nominating me as an Infertility Social Warrior. This is someone that I have never met and I only know through sharing my story publicly. Getting this simple...
Graduated to my OBGYN :: 8 week ultrasound
It feels like it was yesterday that I was in my OBGYN's office with my first pregnancy. Yet, it also feels like a lifetime ago at the same time. Does that make sense? It feels like yesterday in that it is familiar. The waiting room, the doctor, and the casual...
we have a heart beat!!!
Going in today I was extremely more nervous than I thought I would ever be. Why was I so nervous? Honestly, It comes down to hearing and reading so many stories where there was no heart beat. I know this should not effect me so much, but how could it not? I'm only...
second ultrasound
Has it already been a week? Time is flying by but still going slowly as we wait for the heart beat! Today we ALL went in for the second ultrasound because T is getting over a virus and was not able to go to daycare today. Secretly, I didn't mind as I loved having my...
first ultrasound
It's been a little over a week since we got the voicemail that we are pregnant. To be honest with you, it still does not feel real. I have gone to work every day, continue life with the daily routines. ... Every now and then, I pause and think - "wait? I'm pregnant!"...
THE RESULTS ARE IN!
OMG !!! I can't believe this day has finally come. The moment when we find out if we are pregnant or not. The wait felt like forever. In reality it was just a little over a week 😉 The day started with me going into blood work for the pregnancy test....
pregnancy test tomorrow!
T gives my belly a kiss and a pep talk. We asked her if there was anyone in there and if so, could she say hello for us. I sit here writing the night before my pregnancy test. Tomorrow morning I will get up, just as I have done for the countless morning monitoring...
a little spotting? nervous.
*Photo above from shutterstock. Don't worry - I did not take a picture of myself in the bathroom! I just went to the bathroom to find a little spotting. (sorry if this is TMI! but after everything I have shared, this should not be a big deal). My initial...
the dreaded progesterone shot …
The Progesterone Shot I do not know if it was because the progesterone shot was the last of the shots I took last time that it has created a strong memory in my mind, but this is the shot that I dread. During the last IVF cycle, I remember distinctly the feeling of...
what might be going on in there? stages of the embryo
As I sit here waiting for my pregnancy test on Monday, I was wondering "what" might be happening in there? I mentioned the other day I felt unusually tired and had cramping pains that felt like a pulsating localized to a specific spot. It lasted for about...
This IVF cycle is successful (regardless of pregnancy results)
Below is the FB Live feed on this topic Looking back at these past couple of months since I have "come out" with my infertility struggles, I feel like a completely different person. I am a better person. The whole experience of telling my story, FB Live feeding and...
the waiting …
It's been four days since my transfer. I took the weekend off from writing an entry so that I could relax. I'm not sure if that worked since we travelled for the weekend and 8+ hours in the car was not the most ideal relaxation time for me 😉 ... Either way, it was...
transfer day
The day has come ... this morning I was beyond nervous waiting for the phone call from my doctor. I would check my phone every other minute making sure the sound was on (which I never usually have it on) and checking to see if I had missed any calls. Dr. Chung...
acupuncture
Acupuncture My first experience with acupuncture was during the begining of my infertility journey, only 1 year of trying to concieve. I had always heard that it could be helpful for fertility so I had decided to try it out. I tried out one acupuncturist down in the...
results from egg retrieval
Dr. Chung just phoned with the results from yesterday's egg retrieval. For those that do not know, 2 out of 3 of our past IVF cycles, I never even made it to the transfer stage because they did not progress to a day 5 Blastocyst for transfer. With this in mind plus...
egg retrieval day is here!
I'm sitting in the waiting room waiting to be called to the OR. I have my Medical band on, pulse monitor on my finger and IV in. The room is filled with mostly couples. I am by myself since Matt had to take t to daycare. He should be here soon. I hope he is here...
retrieval pre-op
6:30 am pre-op for tomorrow's retrieval surgery. Just when I thought that I might get this morning to sleep in and not go in for morning monitoring, I still needed to come in for pre-op and bloodwork for Monday's retrieval. The pre-op was very straight forward and...
trigger shot
II'm writing this one hour before I am scheduled to take my trigger shot. What is the trigger shot in IVF? The “trigger shot” is essentially a dose of Human Chorionic Gonadotropin (hCG), a pregnancy hormone produced by the placenta that encourages the production of...
endless morning monitoring …
Today is Friday. I have been to morning monitoring 5 times out of the last 6 days. Every morning getting up at 5:30 am to leave the apt at 6 am - blood work/ultrasound and come rushing home hoping to see T before school than off to work myself. I feel it all...
It only takes 1 right? Low number of eggs ..
Another morning, another day of morning monitoring. I'm on Day 10, and I have just come back from morning monitoring. I am currently taking 300 Gonal F, 150 Menopur and 0.25 mg Cetrotide every evening. One of the most important things about morning monitoring is...
mother’s day at morning monitoring
It's Mother's Day and I'm back at morning monitoring, a great way to start the day! Who needs breakfast in bed when you can get up at 5:30 am to go get blood work and an ultrasound done. 🙂 As I left Cornell, the waiting room was packed with women. ...
end of the first week
The end of the first full week. It's 7:30 am and I'm currently sitting in the waiting room at Cornell waiting to be called up for my ultrasound. I have already gotten my blood drawn. I just hope I can get back in time to see T for a mini second before she...
no more exercise?!? … noooooo!!!!
I definitely had forgotten the "no exercise" instructions in this process. I know this because when the nurse read it to me, I think I groaned out loud. What does this mean to me? If you know me well you know that I exercise quite often. The...
Here comes the shots! :: Gonal-F & Menopur
The evening has arrived for the first set of shots. I am surprisingly more nervous and emotional than I thought I would be (and no, it's not the medication (yet!) although, I am on the estrogen patch 😉 .. ). The needles are also longer than I remembered them to...
IVF morning monitoring … What is it?
It's 6:55 am and I have just arrived to the waiting room for morning monitoring. I realized that I often mention morning monitoring but you may not necessarily know what it is. This journal entry is for you! I am refreshing my memory as well - since it's the first...
The time has come! Going in for morning monitoring … The start of IVF
This is happening so quickly! I just feel like it was yesterday when Matt and I were talking about trying for miracle #2. I got my period today which means Monday morning, tomorrow, I am going into morning monitoring to begin this IVF cycle. What does that mean? My...
coculture biopsy complete
Let the medical prodedures begin! Today I went in for my coculture biopsy. If you want to learn more about coculture, see my previous journey entry explaining what it is. Below is a breakdown of my experirence getting the coculture biopsy this morning. - Check in...
coculture … what is it?
I have thrown out the term "Coculture" many times in my story and since telling my story. Many of you might be wondering - okay, now tell me again exactly what this coculture is. Wait no further, this post is just for you! Endometrial Coculture Is a technique of...
meditation
Meditation. I started practicing meditation during my previous infertility journey. I had mentioned in my infertility story, that I felt like I tried everything from western to eastern methods. Meditation was no exception. One of the biggest challenges when going...
the estrogen patch
Today, I start my estrogen patch. As far as medications go, this is probably the least disruptive and easiest to manage. It's pretty much a thin clear sticker that goes on your body. It is thin enough where you do not feel it and small enough so it does not get in the...
here come the meds …
This is really happening! You know when you plan something, but it doesn't set in until later? I say this for vacations ... It doesn't quite set in that I'm on vacation or I am going somewhere until I actually land at my destination. Not as uplifting as the vacation...
managing expectations …
What's the secret to happiness?!? .... LOW EXPECTATIONS!! In all seriousness, there is a lot of truth in the statement above. I am not entirely sold on keeping low expectations with everything in life, I do also agree with the arguments that if we set low...
we need to take your blood …
You will hear this often when you are going through infertility treatments. Blood is taken A LOT. If you are terrified of needles, you will learn quickly not to be. Needles are an everyday scene when it comes to infertility treatments. Today, I was giving blood for...
the waiting room …
I'm sitting in the waiting room for morning monitoring for the first time since I tried for Teagan. It hasn't changed one bit. It's all coming back. The waiting room itself is pleasant, much nicer than the previous two clinics I had gone to. It is a very long are with...
i’m ovulating!
One of the first things you learn when you are actively trying to have a child is how the menstrual cycle works. If you are like me, you really did not know that much about it, thinking I could get pregnant at any point when I was not having my period. Not the case!...
it’s so overwhelming!
It's funny how quickly you forget .. or how quickly I forget. As I am going through this process again, I continue to get these flash backs of how it works and what needs to be done. I can't even count how many times I have said to myself "oh yeah ... I remember now"....
coffee? no coffee??! what? … fertility diet!
Where do I begin? I have been here before ... It seems like a long time ago that I was on my diet. All the memories are coming back now, going to a restaurant and looking at the menu not being able to eat that much. I remember thinking, wow - I am now that super...
vitamins!
Here is my line up: Prenatal Multivitamin Prenatal DHA Magnesium L-Arginine Bromelain Vitamin C L-5-MTHF Inositol CoQ10 How did I come up with these set of vitamins? My acupuncturist recommended them and I trust her advice. To be honest, it was a sense of relief to...
here comes the bills …
I haven't even started the real treatments yet and I feel like I keep on getting bills in the mail! One of the big stresses associated with infertility (if infertility was not enough!) are the costs associated with treatments. If you ask any parent if they could put...
hoping for miracle #2
After successfully beating the less than 1% odds and having my first baby (see my infertility story), I am currently trying & hoping for #2. I am documenting it all here through my journal, FB live feeds as well as sharing all my scheduling and financial cost information. I hope this helps you in your journey. Here’s to HOPE !